So it turns out I was able to convince my parents to let me do lacrosse.  Woohoo.  The meeting’s tonight.  Hopefully it won’t cost too much b/c I’m not sure I can afford it.  Still no luck w/ Stanford, but whatever.  They don’t have my major anyway.

            I haven’t written in awhile.  I hate leaving big time gaps in my Xanga.  Hmm…this weekend was pretty awesome.  Notable events include:

• Dupfest – alright I suppose.  Prolly would have enjoyed it more if I was a junior
• Finishing a large pizza w/ Dima in the tree on Mole Island
• Making cute Halloween cookies for Julie’s party
• Seeing The Grudge with Joe – kind of lame.  I wish I got scared more easily
• Trick-or-Treating – Lame, I know, but oh so much fun.  Joe was Kevin Garvey.

            I’ve been in a really blah mood all day.  I think it’s a result of the election.  The whole freaking day I had to listen to pro-Kerryites (not prokaryotes) and pro-Bushites rip each other’s heads off.  Like, I see how the election is a big deal and everything, but seriously.  I’m sick of each side accusing the other side of being uneducated dumbasses b/c that’s just about as ignorant as we-won’t-mention-who’s comment in AP Lit last week.  Obviously both sides are educated, they just have different outlooks on how the world should be handled.  I’m also tired of everyone blindly throwing insults at each other.  People for Kerry need to stop bitching and get over it – he wasn’t that great of a candidate anyway.  Those for Bush should stop gloating and rubbing it in Democrats’ faces – Bush isn’t particularly amazing either.

I’m too pissed off to work.  My parents are being fucking ridiculous about lacrosse.  If I want to take the risk of getting injured, why the fuck should they care?  It’s my body not theirs.  They can’t fucking protect me forever.  I’ll be fucking 18 when the season starts, I can make my own damn decisions.  I even said I’d pay for everything so it’s not like price is an issue.  I hate being an only child.  Maybe if there was another me they wouldn’t care if I broke.  That would be so much more convenient.  They’re being stupid about college too.  “We’re not going to let you apply to Stanford because we don’t want you to have to wait if your plane gets delayed.  And if you’re far you won’t come home as much.”  I don’t fucking care if my plane gets fucking delayed.  And so what if I don’t come home often?  It’s not like I plan on coming home a lot if I stay nearby.  They need to wake up and realize that I’ll have to leave them at some point.  In exactly two months I’ll be a fucking adult.  I’m so sick of this bullshit.  And why the fuck won’t they let me apply online like a normal person?  Thanks for making college apps twice as much work, Mom.  Why must you complicate EVERYTHING???

            I guess the bandquet was ok.  I was too pissed off to be sad that marching band was ending.  Wow, I’m shaking.  I can’t wait to move out of this house.  I’m always happier when I’m away at camp or a band trip.  I need to get out on my own, have my independence.  I don’t need to be fucking watched over anymore.  Keep your damn money, I’ll just go to the University of Alabama and gain $4000 and a laptop in the process.  I need to get out.  NOW.  My parents really need to stop trying to make me do nothing.  Why can’t they fucking understand that I like to DO things?  “No, Laura, don’t get a job, focus on school.  Don’t do a sport!  You’ll get hurt like you did last year in track.  Just go home right after school and do you’re homework.”  I don’t WANT to fucking come straight home and do my homework everyday after school.  I hate people who don’t do anything.  Ha, maybe not, but I’d hate it if I didn’t do anything.  I fucking got straight A’s last year when I did track, and no one fucking cares about 2^nd semester senior year anyway.  And just because I hurt myself last year in track doesn’t mean that I’ll never be able to run again.  I’m fucking fine now.  Get over it.

            I really don’t care how immature I sound.  I’m fucking ready to explode.

Currently Reading Adam's Curse: A Future without Men By Bryan Sykes see related

               Hmm, I haven’t updated in awhile.  I’m pretty sure there was a lot I was going to write about but of course by now I forgot it all because I forget everything.  Especially my shako.  So, yeah.  This weekend was pretty interesting.  Friday night Dima and I went to Britt’s where Dima died my hair and Britt cut it.  Then Shelly jumped out of the shower wearing a scary gorilla mask (at first I thought it was Joe…jk jk) and scared the shit out of us.  My hair turned out surprisingly well…Dima’s too, although she claims it’s longer in the front than in the back.  I suppose she’s right.

                Saturday Dima and I saw I <3 Huckabees with the Gar-Gars.  We were pretty excited because it talked about existentialism.  Overall, it was a pretty awesome movie.  Unfortunately, our marching performance that night was not so awesome.  The field at Lincoln Way was one giant mud pit.  No joke.  Members of bands got their shoes sucked off their feet so shoes were left on the field.  Since we were one of the last bands to go, it was decided that we would play a stand-still performance.  It was a pretty disappointing last performance ever.  I guess it was memorable though.  After Construction I couldn’t find Lauren so I didn’t know how to cue her horn solo.  It was pretty confusing and there was this terribly long pause but then Beth realized that she was behind the wall on the track and the show went on.  I am proud to say that I remembered my hat. 

            Tonight I went to Britt’s house and “worked on math” which basically consisted of Britt talking on the phone and working and me reading the Sex for Dummies book I gave her last year.  I actually read the whole thing (it was the short pocket version) and then we had an…umm…interesting conversation.  Now I’m kind of worried.  And my teeth are not THAT big.

            Aww.  Joe just stopped by with a dozen roses.  Britt was over mathercizing so unfortunately he couldn’t stay long.  I’m really glad he came over, though.  It was the perfect ending to an amazing weekend.

            Texas was pretty awesome.  It’s always nice to get away from everything in Naperthrill for awhile.  Playing at Waxahatchi’s (sp?) football game was kind of odd.  There was a giant sculpture of a white man in khakis and a polo shirt wearing an Indian headdress that looked like he was hailing Hitler, and all the dancers/cheerleaders wore cowboy hats and ridiculous short skirts.  The crowd seemed really receptive which kind of surprised me.  If we hosted another band at North, I’m pretty sure the crowd wouldn’t give a shit.

            Our performance Saturday kind of sucked.  I’m sure the rain didn’t help.  The stands were really really tall, and conducting from the back of the field was pretty scary cause all I saw was a huge mass of people.  We ended up getting 13^th out of 25 bands.  Not too bad, but not great either.  Watching finals in the rain sucked.  I feel really bad for the bands who had to perform, especially since their performances didn’t even count cause finals got cancelled halfway through due to the rain.

            Saturday night was pretty hilarious.  I remember dreaming about Joe and waking up to find my arm around Dima.  It was pretty odd, and I didn’t know what to do so I just said “whaaaaat” and rolled onto my other side.  Apparently Dima was awake though, and the next morning she asked if I had tried to cuddle with her that night.  I told her what happened and it was pretty funny.  She then decided to tell the whole band that I tried to make out with her.  For the rest of the trip we got into “makeout fights” which basically consisted of messing up each other’s hair.  They got pretty violent.  Vicious.  Fiendish.  Haha.  No. 

            The bus ride back was certainly interesting.  One giant spoon-fest.  It’s funny how marching band hooks people up.  Haha.  I like the analogy someone said on the bus: “Marching band is like 150 spouses.”  It’s so true.

            Ha.  I finally broke the monotony.  Tonight I decided to screw hw and go downtown with Dima.  We went to Book Zeller and Anderson’s and looked at books.  The Babaar Yoga book = BEST BOOK EVER.  It even comes with a poster.  Amazing.  Haha, we didn’t really do anything.  By weekend standards it prolly wouldn’t have been all that awesome but it was definitely a pretty spectacular Thursday night.  It was weird – it didn’t feel like a week night but it didn’t feel like a weekend either.  As Dima put it, it’s like we discovered a new time element.

            I’m in a really really good mood now.  Much improved from my earlier empty stupid mood.  Glad I decided to call.  Tomorrow night should be pretty fun.  Looks like I’m ditching the North v. Central game but that’s ok.  I didn’t really feel like going anyway.

            I should really start doing something.  I don’t want this weekend to end up like last weekend.  But I have a feeling it will.  Yuck x 1000000.